by Willie Geist
First published 2011
The Dollar Bills have built their reputation as the Florida Panhandle's premier get-rich-quick gurus. These self-proclaimed entrepreneurs peddle their secrets to instant wealth from their headquarters, promising clients they can achieve Tom Selleck levels of fortune overnight. Their system revolves around the "5 Cs of Credit," which they define as Cancun, Convertibles, Cognac, Chinchilla Coats, and Cuticles. They push investments in exotic animals and watercraft like cigarette boats and pontoons. The duo even claims expertise through their connection to Freddie Mac, whom they identify as a two-time Pro Bowl safety for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in the 1980s. Their book promises not only financial transformation but also rapid weight loss. The Dollar Bills guarantee results or money back, though they privately admit they never intend to honor refunds. Their ultimate goal involves helping clients turn everything in their lives, including bathroom fixtures, into gold.
Genres: fiction, business, contemporary, comedy
Vibes: fast-paced, humorous, satirical
Tropes: satire, unreliable-narrator
Setting: Florida Panhandle, Tampa Bay
Period: 1980s
256 pages · Paperback · St. Martin's Griffin