First published 2012
Andrew McCarthy stands at a crossroads after nearly four years with his fiancée, unable to commit despite his love for her. Something inside him maintains distance, preventing him from becoming the partner and father he wants to be. Before he loses everything, he embarks on a series of journeys to find answers. He climbs the dangerous slopes of Mt. Kilimanjaro, navigates an Amazonian riverboat filled with chatty passengers, and treks through thick Costa Rican rainforests. These exotic adventures become the backdrop for deeper exploration of his past. McCarthy examines his New Jersey childhood, where acting rescued him before early fame nearly destroyed him. He confronts his complicated relationship with his father and how it shaped his own parenting. He faces the true price of his success and reveals his struggles with relationships, infidelity, and recklessness. Through strange encounters with fellow travelers and dangerous situations that test his limits, McCarthy traces his evolution from doubt to understanding. This intimate memoir chronicles his transformation from ambivalence to acceptance as he discovers what prevents him from fully embracing love.
Genres: adventure, autobiography, contemporary, memoir, non-fiction, biography-memoir, personal-development, family-drama
Vibes: emotional-atmospheric, intimate, thought-provoking
Tropes: personal-journey, self-reflection, transformation
Setting: Amazon, Costa Rica, Mount Kilimanjaro, New Jersey
288 pages · Hardcover · Free Press